Here I am, on the road again. Or for the first time. I'm really not sure which. I, upon doctor's orders, have joined Weight Watchers. I need to lose about 115 pounds. This should be fun. I need help, though. If I hold myself accountable to myself...it will all go to pot. Why? I am a master at self-sabotage. I mean, I'm really, really good at it. The long-term goal of possible child conception isn't even good enough to turn my mind around. I've tried. I really have. As independent as I am on most things in my life, I am terribly dependent and need moral support for something that I have struggled with my whole life due to polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS). My worst enemy. I've been teased and made fun of and laughed at and ridiculed behind my back and to my face for being fat and ugly. I want to lose the weight for my health, not mere vanity. Diabetes runs like a mad river in my family on both sides. My mother and my brother have both had gastric bypasses. I don't want to go that route. In fact, the idea of elective surgery is detestable to me. Anyway, yeah. Moral support. Just drop in, say a word or two of encouragement and help me on my way. Please.
I'm on day three of this POINTS business. My struggle is not overdoing the points, but rather, I don't eat enough of them. Even not changing my eating habits, I don't reach enough points. My issue is only eating once a day, because that's what I have in the house. So, of course, my body is nigh in a state of starvation. That's always helpful when one is trying to lose weight.
I did buy frozen vegetables today, which is good; or so I am told. I even met my points goal! Because my father-in-law bought me lunch from Dairy Queen, which ate up over half of them. Then I made cupcakes with my niece, and ate one. There went a few more. Then I ate dinner! And I used all but one of my points! All very unhealthy food. At least I ate, right?
I'm sure posts will get better as time goes on and I get the flow of my writing back. It's been so long since I've written anything other than papers and school work. Whee.
It will all pay off in the long run!! Weight loss is the only thing that is proven to help with PCOS so you are on the right track!
ReplyDeleteLet me know if I can do anything to help. I'm rooting for you, lady! I know what an awful struggle it is.
I am really proud of you for writing about this and am happy that you have invited me to stand beside you as you start this journey. I know that you can and will do this! Don't worry about your past fails, I think you realize that now is the right time and you will conquer. I have faith in you!
ReplyDeleteI will keep checking this blog, I've got it bookmarked so that I can keep coming back and seeing how you're doing. Stay on track so that I don't have to get onto you. Pissy Tricia is not a nice Tricia.
You have so many good things ahead of you and I know that it will happen. You will be healthy, happy and hopefully holding a sweet little bundle in no time.
Love ya girl.
You know I'm rooting for you! Actually I'm getting inspired to get serious about losing some of my post-preg pounds along with you... maybe we can support each other on this.
ReplyDeleteDrink the water, keep track of your WW points log, do everything they tell you. (Might as well get your money's worth!) You can do this! Believe it! It's true!